I am kinda shocked right now...and a little bit sad!
I believe in Democracy so I will have to come to terms with the results of tonight, Election Day 2008. I did vote, so I can complain about the results a little bit. (You can't complain if you didn't vote!)
Here are some random thoughts on why I think this is a sad day...and I'm mainly doing this just to vent and to record my feelings on this day so that I can look back on them later!
-People aren't considering whether or not Obama is the right man (or black man) for the job- they are just thinking that he will make history as the first black president so he should be voted for. Sadly, many people that have never cared in previous elections (between two white men) are suddenly showing up in masses to vote for their candidate. Is there a worse reason to vote for or against a candidate than skin color? Not in my book.
-A black woman on the radio earlier actually called in saying that she's so excited that she won't have to pay her mortgage or other bills ever again. She said, "I scratched Obama's back so now he'll scratch mine!" Do people truly believe that? If they do they are truly ignorant.
-I can't stand the share the wealth philosophy. I can share my wealth by giving where I see fit. I don't want my money going to useless pests of society.
Speaking of useless...This morning at 9am on my way to a weekly bible study Jessica and I stopped to get a coke at the gas station. There were two women in line, bellies hanging out, buying beer. Ok....so that's already gross in and of itself as it's 9am on a Tuesday. The woman then asks if the gas station accepted food stamps. Not to mention that she smelled of cig smoke and was ONLY buying beer! Are you kidding me?
-I saw a few minutes ago that McCain heard that 50% of people who support him were scared of Obama being elected. McCain did not like that people were scared and believes we have no reason to be. I am not scared in that I think he's a terrorist or anything. I am scared in that his preacher and friend of 20 years is an absolute radical freak! I am scared in that I want my kids to value work and earning your own things and not getting handouts. I am scared in that John McCain had great experience with foreign policy and protecting our nation and Obama most certainly does not. I am scared that other countries know that he's weak in that area and that our country could be vulnerable. I am scared in that his values are nothing like mine....at all.
I also tried to put myself in McCain's shoes. I don't think he's perfect, but I felt for him tonight. I thought that his speech was amazing and touching. I thought if I were him I would be mad at our country. Whether it's right or wrong it's true. I think I would be thinking..."You people just voted for a guy who has served this country in the Senate less time than I was held as a prisoner of war." I spent 5.5 years being held captive and love this country. This guy can't even put his hand over his heart..has never served our country, and identifies more with his race than being an American. I loved that John McCain said he feels no stronger affliation in his life than that to his country. That's powerful, and true. I wouldn't have my freedom of religon, family, friends, husband, home, freedom, that I have without this country...and that is what I want to be in the heart of the person who runs this country. I will NEVER vote for a woman just because she is a woman. Just like the men I've voted for, she'd have to be the RIGHT woman.
-I absolutely detest Obama's speeches. They are like Martin Luther King wannabe speeches. They are flowery and insincere and I can't hardly listen to them. So he gives a good speech so I guess he should be our next president? Hitler was a persuasive speaker, too. I can't believe he is known for his speeches and after listening to both of them tonight there was a hands down winner when it came to sincerity, grace, dignity, and respectfulness. I thought John McCain's concession speech was one of the best speeches I've ever heard!
I have SO MANY MORE THOUGTS ON THIS SUBJECT...but one last note before I'm off to bed (it is 12:30 am afterall and I'm 8 mos pregnant). Jesse Jackson crying after they announced Obama President elect was just a joke. Who still takes him seriously?!?
Sorry spellcheck isn't running and I'm too tired to proofread, so I am going to have to risk looking ridiculous in that area for tonight...
Goodnight!
13 comments:
I heard THAT! Great BLOG! Don't you love that we have to right to voice these opionions!
God Bless America!
I haven't talked with you in a while, and I figured I'd catch up with you through your blog. You're right, "It is a Sad Day!!" For 8 years many of us have sat by and seen our country go to ruins through the bad decisons of a president who refuses to listen to his fellow party, his advisors, and the American people. Many of us have sat by and seen the economy go to ruins, jobs lost, the deficit skyrocket, the highest forclosure ever, and lives lost in a war which we should not have been in, and waited 8 long years!!! 1)I am so sick of people accusing Barack of not being qualified for the job. What credentials did baby Bush have that made him qualified, besides being the son of a former president? Also, like I've told you before, As many people that you say, "voted for him b/c he was black, probably didn't vote for him b/c he was black, but let me tell you that black people alone could not have gotten him into office. Our country united to put him into office b/c we need a change. And for the 1st time in American history, people put aside race and decided to do what is best for the future of our country.
2) You list several examples of people who made ignorant comments, but you made a point to stress their race. There are ignorant people in ALL RACES, and before you dismiss the "share the wealth" philosophy, do your homework. I won't tell you the demographics of largest group that makes of up the welfare group, but I'll give you a hint: It's not the single black mom with 3 kids by 3 different fathers that makes up the largest group of welfare recipients. That group is just what the media wants to portray.
Obama is hailed as one of the greatest orators of our time, as was the great late Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. You have just berated one of the greatest black leaders of all time - WOW. What can you say about MLK? He was a pastor and a peacemaker? I am speechless. And then you have the ardacity to use Obama and Hitler in the same sentence!! That which is different is what we fear, right? Where did you get your information from? From the dirty campaign commercials? I suppose for the next 4 years, you will be watching and judging every decision that Obama makes. That's fine. The truth of the matter is: He's aware of the unspoken truth that he has to be twice as good and work 2x as hard, than his precessors b/c of judgmental haters that are waiting for him to mess up.
While you continue to stress all of the bible classes and morals and values you have, I would challenge to put aside your resentment and fear of something new and pray for the newly-appointed president of the U.S. and his family. I would encourage you instead of casting judgement on the pregnant women that you saw smoking and drinking, that you pray for them and their unborn child. That is the Christian thing to do!!
Uniting and helping one another out is what Obama encouraged us to do in his acceptance speech, but since you couldn't get passed the "flowery and insincere-wanna-be-MLK" part, I guess you missed it.
Oh, and those tears that you saw Jesse Jackson crying, I wouldn't expect that you would understand it...neither would you understand the pride that any African American would have, but I promise you -- it wasn't insincere.
Although we are friends, I have always realized that we are different and see things in a different light, but never would I think that my friend would have echoed these words written in your blog.
Amanda,
I must admit I was sick yesterday, last night, most of today, and even now as I write this. It was a sad day indeed for me as I was and am completely and utterly dumbfounded by your post.
I know you and I have never agreed on politics, which I feel is why we no longer speak of them. We can connect on so many different levels, that for the most part we can leave our politics at the door. But when you post on your blog you must know that I would read your comments. Now far be it from me to ask you to censor yourself. It is your right to post your opinions on your blog. Just as it is my right to post my opinions on my website. I didn't, nor will I, out of respect for the differences I have not only with you, but with other family and friends. That was and is my choice and you are entitled to yours.
It has been well over a day since I first read your post and to be honest I have had to stop myself from writing several times in fear that I would write something so harsh it could not be erased. I only wish you had used the same judgement.
I can only hope that you had no idea how hurtful and offensive your words would be to me, but reading them over and again, I wonder how you could not know.
I want to leave you with one simple reminder... you yourself used to tell me that it was wrong to criticize the president, that regardless of party we should stand behind him. Now you know I never believed that, I believe it is my duty as an American to be critical of my president as I was of Bush, I will be of Obama. But that you have not once used your blog to post about the apparent failures of the current administration and only to bash the president-elect. Well I think that shows that what you really meant was that I should not be critical of a president you supported, but that you were most certainly entitled to be critical of the president-elect you did not support.
I thought to email this directly to you, but I suppose if you felt comfortable enough to put your opinions out there, then you felt comfortable enough to have the response just as public.
Danette
Wow, what a classy thing to do, leave a long-winded and HATEFUL comment when one was just voicing HER opinions on HER FAMILY blog.
Shame on you "Leah" Shame on you!
You have way too much time on your hands.
IF AMANDA GOES INTO EARLY LABOR IT'S ALL ON YOU DANETE.
Leah,
Please check your email, I don't have anything "political" to say about Obama, but I am hurt right now, from someone I considered a friend, and hurt from knowing how you would treat a GOOD friend!
To Leah:
My main point, that I continue to stand by that fired me up long before Election Day was that this election is far from people “seeing past race.” I wish it was! However, every time someone says that it is a historic election and that’s why they are voting then that is just saying that a black man is running so one must vote. That people are 30, 40, 50, 80 years old and just voting for the first time is not only pathetic but racist in my opinion. There are important issues that affect everyone in every election and I find it disturbing that those issues never get these people to the polls and aren’t as important when two white men are running for president. I have yet to hear people say that there is an amazing man whom they respect and have researched running that they are so excited about voting for…just that it’s a historic election. That’s not a very good reason to vote! And, I would NEVER vote for a woman blindly (which is definitely what is happening in some cases) just because it’s a historic election. Do I have a problem with civil rights or women or people of color becoming President? Absolutely not. I think you know that about me and I think you know my heart but yet still jumped to conclusions. I am SO thankful for the women who fought long and hard for me to have my right to vote…and even to put my opinions out here on my blog!
I think it is CRAZY that people will not admit that race played a part (or whole) in them voting for Barack Obama. For many, that’s all that mattered. Whoopi Goldberg on ‘The View’ claimed that her daughter and another family member voted for the first time in their life. Also, another ‘View’ Co-host, Sherri Shepperd, voted for the very first time (she‘s been old enough to vote for years). Why was this election so important? She admitted because she wanted her son to have hope that he could aspire to be President. Nothing to do with Barack other than his color? Hmm. Well, I guess at least she admitted it! So many people won’t give their true motivation for their choice.
Secondly, the women using their food stamps to buy beer on a Tuesday morning that smelled of cigarette smoke. Here are a few details you missed. First, they were not pregnant and I have no idea where that came from. There is no unborn child to worry about. Second, they were white…white trash at that. I was only using that example as a reason I voted that day. I hate welfare. In Thessalonians there is a verse that says if a man is not willing to work neither shall he eat. Can’t get any more plain than that. I hate the system. That was my point. I didn’t quite get where the demographics or race came into this part…I have no respect for those on welfare…white, black, fat, skinny…doesn’t matter to me at all! You should not be able to use monetary aid from the government to buy a non essential item such as beer! Who could disagree with that? I guess someone just looking to argue for the sake of arguing. I despise the system and don’t have respect for those who support it. That is my opinion and I am so thankful for my right to share it!
Thirdly, I have to address where you misunderstood my comments on Barack’s speeches. I most certainly did not berate Martin Luther King, Jr.; I was actually doing the opposite (however, if I did that would also be my opinion and my right, of course!). I was saying that Barack’s speeches lack substance and are full of flowery fillers. In his acceptance speech he said, in this moment, in this election, on this stage, blah blah blah…get to the point! Surely you aren’t judging how I listen to his speeches or my opinion of them. King’s speeches were obviously full of hopes, dreams, goals, etc and I have no problem with them, never have. I believe Barack is in a way mimicking that in a less profound, less original way that is insincere and is easily seen thru for many. Instead of sugar coating I just wish he’d get real. People have made such bad decisions as far as getting into debt, buying homes they cannot afford, killing their unborn children, etc that I guess they need things sugar coated! That’s the last thing this country needs. Again, I so have the right to that opinion and that is how I feel. There is nothing disrespectful about it. I don’t have much respect for him, as I’ve done so much research that I don’t care to know all of the things that he believes that terrify me. I do, however, respect the office of the President and plan to continue to be a productive, prospering, honest citizen and to continue to pray for him and all of our leaders as they are such huge influences in our world. You told me that would be the Christian thing to do, for some reason assuming that I wasn’t already doing so. Another misunderstanding, I suppose. I see you were also offended that I brought up Hitler. I wasn’t comparing them. I was just commenting that Hitler and many bad leaders before him used very eloquent and savvy speech to unite people behind their cause. Great speeches (if that’s how you see it) do not make a great leader. I’m so sad that’s what people are going off of instead of doing their own research.
I believe, obviously, that our country is having a hard time right now. I am, however, certain that it is not George Bush’s fault. First off, the President doesn’t have the power to put a country in ruins in the ways you described. It is the naïve and uninformed who believe that, possibly the same people who believe he was at fault for the response to Katrina (when in fact it was the people who didn’t leave a city under sea level and the local and state government that is so corrupt there) looking for someone to blame who is far removed. Luckily, in our country we have checks and balances, and what’s funny about that is that our country has gone down the most (as have our financial markets) since the congress became majority democratic in 2006. And let me tell you that congress has as much or more control than the President, but yet since it’s not a single person to blame never gets mentioned for it’s mistakes by name. Congress also helped get us in this war, with several Democrat’s votes for it, of course. But yet, it is all George Bush’s fault. People always want to play the victim and find a scape goat to blame. How convenient.
Luckily, because of my own research and that of a certain family member who does nothing but research our economy and financial markets, I completely have an understanding of why we are where we are. I am very informed and know that one person (Obama or McCain) could not pull us out of this overnight, or maybe at all until it runs it’s course. It is like a 100 year flood and will happen and then, of course, it will pick back up again. Congress has spent trillions (I think around three to be exact) recently trying to bail out companies who couldn’t support themselves and it hasn’t worked. That is, of course, the democratic congress. But, after all you say that Bush is responsible for the debt our country carries. Ha!
As far as Jesse Jackson and his tears and my comment about who takes him seriously anymore. Jesse Jackson has stuck his nose in everything from Terry Schaivo to the Duke Lacrosse Rape case-paying for the “woman’s” college no matter the outcome of the case. Well those guys ended up innocent. And he has said he wanted to cut off Obama’s private parts and called him the N word (that‘s on tape, of course). All after leading a national campaign to stop using the N word, of course. Then he cries the night Barack is determined President elect. Obviously he doesn’t think much of the guy. He really should make up his mind about his feelings on issues such as the N word and Barack Obama before people take him seriously!
In summary, people did anything but put race aside. It was a factor that got ungrateful, lazy citizens to the poles for the first time in their lives because there was going to be change (change of race, of course).
I’m so glad I wrote this blog. Let’s see where we are in four years, and what this miracle worker Obama can do for us! If you knew the real problems with our economy you wouldn’t be talking about this change! I’m sorry, but it’ll be a long road to change the course of our economy. And, it is because of many factors, not one man. One man who has had a tough presidency. Not only 9/11 months into it but also Katrina and the stress that came along with that. We will see what history writes about him but I don’t have bad things to say about him. I am thankful that he was able to capture Saddam Hussein and bring him to justice. I cried that day he got captured and thought it was wonderful that he would finally see justice. Funny how well things are going in Iraq these days and how thankful the people are that we are there and how the soldiers have so been touched by being a part of it that they have a hard time leaving. I do wish we would’ve gotten the same result with Bin Laden and definitely see that as a mistake of all involved. But, after all, Clinton could’ve prevented that!
I think it is hypocritical that the liberals (aka the open-minded) have the hardest time accepting other’s opinions. This is my blog, I author it. I have my right to voice my opinion and no one else’s will change it. I already had a good handle on your politics and you, mine. I am the close-minded conservative and have yet to show anger and judgment as you have to me. That usually happens in my conversations with liberals/democrats and it is the most ironic and hypocritical thing I’ve ever seen. It always amazes me.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB122385651698727257.html
(that should've been .html at the end of the above link)
To Danette:
I wish I would’ve understood more of what you are getting at. Of course you know me very well and know that I would not intentionally hurt anyone’s feelings (especially a friend), especially your’s. I think you know that I am about being open and honest, and that I have strong views (as do you). I do not wish to hide them, as I am not ashamed of them, nor did I think that they would hurt feelings. I hope to find out what statements hurt you so that I can come to a better understanding of what you’re saying. Also, I am not against you responding to my feelings with your real feelings. I do not feel that we have to agree on politics as friends, as we do have so much else in common. I think you (and our minutes shown on phone bills) will agree that we find plenty of other things to talk about.
Also, as far as my statements on supporting the President. I still believe that. I still respect his office and position and am praying for him and his family that they might gain wisdom and understanding and lead us in the right direction. Obviously it is harder to do when you don’t respect someone but I do still believe that our country voted him into that office, which is why at the beginning of the post I said that I believe in Democracy and will have to come to terms with his new position. Of course, I never thought we’d have an unpatriotic president that believes, “God Damn America” (you know what I’m talking about so I won’t explain further) and who doesn’t put their hand over their heart during the times that we traditionally do. I admit, it will take some getting used to for me. And I am proud that these are things that disgust me and that I do not identify with, as my moral compass would then prove to be off.
Maybe reading my response to Leah will give you a better understanding of my statements or maybe it won’t. I’m not sure if you wanted an explanation of my views or just to let me know that they hurt your feelings.
I am torn because I always think that the more liberal, open-minded people are okay with everyone having their own opinion and making their own decisions. Yet, it is that type of person who judges what I think more than anyone. With the open-minded, anything goes type of thinkers I am always baffled when I am told what is wrong with my thinking and how hurtful my ideas are.
As far as not criticizing the current administration, I don’t have much to say and even if I did don’t feel anyone else needs to tell me that I should post about it or should not post negatively about Obama. I happen to believe that history will tell what kind of job Bush did as President. He’s accomplished quite a bit in my opinion. He had to deal with 9/11, war, Katrina, etc. I believe he has had a very stressful tenure. I also believe that the President cannot declare war alone, and that congress and several dems voted for the war. He’s had advisors over there giving him information that we will never hear of. Iraq is now going very well, not to mention that Saddam Hussein has been removed. What an accomplishment! And quite possibly if Clinton had taken care of Bin Laden when he could’ve we wouldn’t have had to deal with 9/11 at all. As far as the economy, that also has little to do with him. I think people just need someone to blame so he’s taking the fall. I think it’s sad and I think that he’s a good man who has good intentions who has done the best he could with the information he had. And, he’s definitely kept our country safe since 9/11 and for that I am thankful.
Of course I was not offended or bothered that you put your response on the blog rather than email. However, if you wish to explain further what I still don’t understand you can do it off of this blog if you wish (since you didn‘t get too specific in your comment).
Response to Leah:
1. You are sadly mistaken if you think people put aside race to vote for Obama, unless you are only talking about whites putting aside race.It is obvious that many whites put aside race, yet I do not believe blacks did the same. I heard several black people interviewed about Obama. The interview was to determine whether or not they were truly voting for him because of his policies or because of his color. They were asked, "Do you agree with Obama's belief in pro-life?" They answered, "Oh, yes, I believe in pro-life." "Do you agree with his stance to stay in Iraq and finish the war?" "Yes, I agree with that." Then they were asked the most telling question, "Do you think his choice for Vice President, Sarah Palin, has enough experience?" Their reply, "Yes, she will do a good job." They did not even have a clue what his beliefs were or who his running mate was, just that he was black, therefore they were voting for him. I have seen this kind of thinking before...maybe you remember O.J. Simpson? Now, if a white pro-football player slit his wife's throat from ear to ear, the majority of white America would not think he was innocent because he was a WHITE famous athlete. However, that is just what happened in this country. The vast majority of black people believed him to be innocent, just because he was a famous black man. The day he was found not guilty there were hysterical tears of joy by black America, similar to what was seen the night Obama was elected. Putting aside race??
2. His qualifications- I guess if you count 143 days in office as the most liberal voting Senator as being qualified then he is qualified.
3.Welfare statistics-From the research I've done, there are 38.8%whites on welfare and 39.8% blacks on welfare. Since there are four times as many whites as blacks in America, I think it is easy to see that if you compare percentages per population, there is a much higher percentage of blacks on welfare. Just wanted to clarify your point.
4. We had 7 years of plenty with Bush! It is amazing that just because of the past 4-6 months of being in a recession, all we've heard is how it is Bush's fault. Research how Clinton believed all Americans had the right to own a house, and his cronies in Congress passed a law that forced the mortage companies to approve loans for unqualified individuals, and made the loans available with no documentation. Now when we are faced with a recession, which can happen regardless of which party is in office, all of the blame goes to the current president (Bush).(Wall Street Journal and NY Times 1998)
I am so sick of whining about the war. Anyone in the military volunteered to be there. Now, if they only wanted a free college education, or a paycheck, shame on them. They knew the possibilities of war while in the military. Most of the military personnel that I've seen interviewed have been very positive about Iraq. (Of course the liberal media does not want us to know this.) Contrast someone who volunteered to be in danger and possibly killed, with the millions of babies killed every year through abortions. (Many more are killed than those killed in the war.) These babies are innocent and never even asked to be brought into this world, yet Obama believes in taking these lives. Personally, I can't believe any Christian would vote for Obama, regardless of their color.
If all I knew about Obama was that he had the support of France, Hollywood, and Jesse Jackson, that would be all I needed to know to realize that Obama and I do not share the same values.However, he has been elected as the next President, and I will pray for him to turn to God for guidance and hopefully, not to his preacher of 20 years that said, "God damn America."
Anyone who knows Amanda would not blame a possible early labor on Dannette. If you think a political discussion is too much for her, you don't know how tough she is. After all, she has been through the death of her grandfather, amniocentesis,a needle biopsy of her thyroid, and is now facing surgery once baby Jake is here. When you have been through a year like we have, you realize there are many more important things in life than political disagreements , good friends, being one of them!!
The point that I was trying to get across in my original post was that we no longer talk politics for a reason. I felt that reason was the genuine understanding that we are friends in spite of our differences, not because of them.
While you feel that hiding your views would mean that you are ashamed of them and that you had no idea you might hurt feelings, you acknowledge that in the past tempers have flared over differences of opinion (“I… have yet to show anger and judgment as you have… (t)hat usually happens in my conversations with liberals/democrats.”) I feel that by not sharing my view with you I am not hiding my opinions from you; I am deferring with respect to our friendship as well as our differences.
Furthermore, I agree with your mom when she said, “When you have been through a year like we have, you realize there are many more important things in life than political disagreements , good friends, being one of them!!” Absolutely true! When I read your original post I felt that there was no point in expressing your opinion in the way you did. I thought that if someone who was faced an unknown ailment and was 8 months pregnant could not see that there were more important things in life to get worked up over, then maybe I did not know that person or her priorities the way I thought I did.
Your opinion, your blog, and your right to say what you want. I agree you have your right to your opinion, you have every right to say what you want and yes, this is your blog. What I do not agree with is the notion that somehow having a blog absolves you of personal responsibility for your words. I do not agree that having a blog means that you are exempt from someone addressing you in the same tone and manner in which you addressed everyone who views your blog. I do not believe that having a blog means you can ignore civility. With every right, comes responsibility. You had a choice. You know what friends of yours agree with your opinions (I can certainly name at least two), but rather than emailing them, you chose to address everyone that visits your blog. If you maintain that your blog is your sounding board to say anything you want regardless of who it might offend, well then I guess I was mistaken in what your intent was in starting a blog to begin with. I am not saying you have no right to do it; I am merely saying that out of respect for individual beliefs you should have thought twice about whether or not your entitlement to post was more important than the hurt your words caused both me and Leah. And if you maintain that your right to post your opinion on your blog was more important, as you seem to have in your response to Leah, well then I guess you have made another choice altogether, haven’t you?
So here we are, notice I did not go line by line through your post and explain exactly what bothered me. Why? Because the mere fact that you posted your opinion on this subject, on which I could not agree with you less, on your blog as though you were entitled by right to do so, was offensive. Notice I have said nothing to counter your political beliefs? Why? Because it would be pointless, as you said, “No one is going to change your mind.” Notice I didn’t list my political beliefs? Why? Because they are mine, I do not need to share them with you or anyone else, nor do I find it necessary to be able to prove my point. I have someone with whom I can vet my thoughts and my arguments concerning politics and the political process, that person is not you or anyone else privy to this very public conversation.
I think you yourself said it best when you said, “I am scared in that his values are nothing like mine....at all.” Nothing like yours at all? Not anything? Not one thing? And of Bush, you think he is “a good man who has good intentions who has done the best he could.” You have nothing at all positive to say about Obama and nothing at all negative to say about George Bush. You have managed to reduce two human beings that are by nature complex, to singular one-sided objects. So now for all your research and for all your inside information that gives you a complete understanding of what is going on, you have simply proven that it is all to reinforce what you already believe and not to even begin to challenge those thoughts. So really there is no point in arguing with you, or attempting to disprove your ideas, or most importantly, to even imagine that you could ever accept that anyone else might ever rationally, intelligently, and factually come to a conclusion other than yours since, to you, the world truly is black or white, red or blue.
Danette
Amanda,
I thought I'd try one last time to get my point across before you say what you have to say in response to what I posted yesterday.
I wanted you to know that I was hurt by what you wrote in your post and so I thought I would let you know. Keep in mind that I had to think long and hard before I posted about what I wanted to come from even telling you that I was hurt. I felt that what I wanted was for you to acknowledge that you knew we had differences of opinion and that you understood that I was hurt by what you posted. Maybe even to go so far as to recognize that because we are so different that perhaps you might have realized that posting something as though no other thought process could logically exist could have offended someone who in fact does think differently. I guess I wanted you to acknowledge that I defer these conversations out of respect to you (and other family and friends who think like you) and that you could have done the same.
That is not what I felt you were saying in your response nor do I think it is what you were saying in your response to Leah (which you referred me to).
So I posted again yesterday, trying to give you more of an understanding of what I was getting at, since you asked.
But something happened tonight. Nothing big, as most revelations I don't really think are, just a random moment of clarity that made me take a step back and see the bigger picture.
Obviously I had to think about what I wanted to accomplish by posting the first time. I think I felt you should know I was hurt. However I think I also knew you would respond much the way you did. I felt it was pretty likely you would go on the defensive, which I feel you did in your responses to both Leah and I. I took a gamble and obviously I lost, because here we are exactly one week post election and we are still involved in an exchange of words. I had a choice to keep silent about how I felt; I chose not to.
So here's what happened tonight. In preparation for Nico's birthday this weekend we've decided to finally get some photos up on our wall. That involves going through photos and of course you and Jeremy are in there. You were a guest at my wedding, at my baby shower, and you came to see my son after he was born. You have been and are a part of my life.
Now here is the tough part, but one I realize is more important than opinions about presidental elections or even the right to express them. I have to find a way to mend the situation even if it means that I may never get the response I wanted. I am not recinding on what I feel or my opinions as I have would not ask you to do so, I am merely saying that I recognize truly, that there are more important things in life than this disagreement. Now I could choose to do this off the blog, but I feel that having been so public up to this point, it would be wrong of me to try to save face by doing so and that action could actually speak louder than the words I am trying to say.
And so it goes...
I wanted you to know that I forgive you for hurting my feelings and I hope that you can forgive me for hurting yours.
Danette
Danette,
I wasn't really that hurt after your first response, but after the second I was a little bit hurt and a little bit angry.
I did choose to post about my feelings and I chose to defend my feelings as well by responding to you and Leah's first comments (in which I felt both of you were on the defensive-for something not even directed at you). I felt that I was being attacked (mostly after Leah's response) and I was just letting her (and you) know that I had reasons for my beliefs. I am not merely accepting what I am handed. This is a bad example, but I have received many emails that I then researched and have never chosen to pass on-because even if I wanted them to be true-they ended up being false. And I don't want to spread false information on anyone. I feel that I wasn't attacking anyone (or any of my friends or blog followers atleast) with my first post, but was mainly stating that people (not everyone, and not all blacks) had voted solely because of race. I think that should bother you, and me, and Leah. And truly I would argue the same had I heard of anyone that didn't vote for him or anyone else because he IS black. And I thought we'd all agree that those women on food stamps were out of control and that was something we'd end up talking on the phone about and laughing about. I also thought we'd all agree that expecting not to pay bills ever again if Obama were elcected was hilarious. I thought the things I was upset about were so outrageous that they would not get defended from anyone, no matter their values or party affiliation. I truly don't feel anger for people who did vote for Obama after thought and research. I do believe that there are people, black and white and everything in between, who voted for him after educating themselves and those are not people who I was directing my feelings toward. I was disappointed because the people who voted blindly (mostly the first time voters that only knew that he was black and had no further information) gave him enough edge to decide the election. Obviously the system allows uninformed people to vote so I had to accept the outcome, and I already have. I was just venting a frustration I didn't think people would blame me for. No matter your political position I felt that my points were more about a small group of people that helped put him into office. I know that you would never vote without researching everything, and truly didn't feel that you'd be negatively affected by my post. I certainly can't apologize for my opinions but I can say that I am sorry it has caused hurt to one of my closest friends. I truly hope that your hurt was because you misunderstood my intentions and purpose. You are not just a part of my life, but a big part and I never thought that this would damage or destroy a friendship. But, I want my friends to be able to know how I feel about things and still accept them even if they are different from their own. I mean, if someone read my post that I was good friends with and decided that they didn't want to remain friends I would not stop them, those truly are my feelings and I don't want to have to hide them to keep friendships.
However, I do believe (and have for the past week) that friendship is more important than our little political debate. And I am actually glad that we have expressed our feelings. I am sorry for hurting your feelings and have already forgiven you. I hope that thru my defending (explaining) myself that you understand it wasn't you or any of my other friends that I was directing my frustrations toward, hence, my confusion over how your feelings were hurt.
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