Thankful

Well, I am laying in bed. It's almost midnight and I am just pondering something that's sadly normal for so many people. Tonight I watched an episode of "Teen Mom" on MTV. It used to be "16 and pregnant" but the babies are now here so it's a whole new show. Anyway, one of the teen moms, Maci, was discussing custody with her ex-fiance. They have an almost two year old named Bentley (boy) and she has him all of the time, except for every Wednesday and every other weekend. Her ex fiance, Ryan, wants more time with the baby. So, basically he went to a lawyer and put a limit on her moving away and wants to take her to court to figure out a new custody arrangement. Anyway, the part that really touched me and brought me to tears was the part where Ryan tells Maci that he wants Bentley to be with him for three days a week, and then with Maci for three days. I guess it's beside the point that Ryan's parents seemed to be pushing him to get more time with Bentley. I felt like he only really wanted it half-heartedly. But, I also understand that he hardly spends time with him and never showed any interest in the baby for his whole first year of life. Maci carried, gave birth to him and has cared for him (with the help of her parents) around the clock and seems to be a good mother. But the part that made me so sad was where she told Ryan that it's not fair for Bentley to move every three days, and that that is not a home. I just can't stand that. I can't stand that each parent is missing their baby while he's with the other parent and that the baby doesn't have a "home". I also cannot stand that this is so normal for our society. You're not meant to make a baby with someone that you love, out of that love, and then turn around and treat them as a stranger and fight over your child in court (And I am also aware that Bentley was probably made just as much out of teenage lust as he was love--but this just got me thinking of families in general). I know it happens and I know that it is common. I also know that because of it's abundance in our society we've become very desensitized to the broken family in general. Because I have not seen this situation day in and day out and didn't come from a broken family -seeing it on TV has made it so very real.
So, tonight I lay in bed, on the laptop looking at pictures of my sweet boys. I love them both dearly and believe that it is God's plan for us to be together as a family, through thick and thin as long as we each shall live. I can't imagine saying goodbye to Jake for days at a time. I can't imagine having to go to court over Jake ....playing tug-of-war with Jeremy (but believe me if there was reason enough for us to divorce I would FIGHT for that baby boy;) Are you reading this, Jeremy?). I do believe that there are situations where this is necessary- to remove yourself and your kids from a certain situation. I definitely believe, though, that the situations are few and far between in comparison to how many divorces and broken families there are in our society. I believe that divorce is the hardest easy way out that there is--especially on the kids.
My heart is aching for all of you touched by the tragedy that is divorce. Just because it is common does not believe that we should become worldly in our views, that it is right, or that we have to accept it in our homes, among our own family.
I will fight with all that I have for my family. I know that our problems have been and will be no less than that of any other family. My prayer and hope is that we will survive together. Actually, as I told Jeremy after we finished watching that show together..."Please don't ever divorce me. Please don't ever do anything that would make me want or need to divorce you...because you are stuck with me." I love my Jakey and my husband so much and I believe that we are meant to work through things and to stay together always. I can't imagine living our life any other way and I am so thankful for the family that I have and that I can see my boys together, any day of the week. I am thankful to be surrounded by lots of people who protect their marriages and families, and are a good example for me and my family. I feel sheltered in a good way from this sad phenomenon, and I know that I am blessed and that others are not so fortunate and have no control over what they have been put through by their parents and/or spouse.

I will say a special prayer tonight for those of you whose hearts, homes and families have been broken, my heart aches for you and I have a new appreciation for my own little family.